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The Prosecution: Beth

At times I'm recorded while I’m eating. I’ll see myself on her Instagram – it feels like a jumpscare.

My best friend of 10 years, Marielle, labels herself the “content queen”. It can be amusing for a bit, but it weighs on our relationship.

Being highly outgoing, there's a constant urge the need to record everything all the time. When we eat out, her motto is, “The camera eats first,” and snaps pictures with the flash on, which makes me cringe. It's unpleasant when other people see her performing for the camera – I experience vicarious awkwardness. It also frustrates me because meals lose their warmth.

She's not quite an online personality yet, but she is trying to be. She creates vlogs about city life, her daily routine, and her styling career. The material is quality, credit where it's due, but I don’t want to be dragged into it. On occasion I'm captured while dining, or just accompanying her. Later, I appear on her Instagram later, and it comes like a surprise: I might be bare-faced, making a strange expression or photographed mid-bite. It feels invasive.

She also expects me to record her at inopportune moments. Often I’ll be talking to someone else, or we're simply hanging out in the street. I feel like our bond has transformed into me being her unpaid videographer. She could easily hire someone if she wanted high-quality content. When I brought up my unease about the situation, she brushed it off. I've been invited to a couple of brand events, which were appreciated, but that doesn't compensate for all the energy I spend helping her create material.

I’m grateful that she has helped me with my design career, but I resist our connection to become just a ledger of favours. I don't believe she’s fake or inauthentic, but at times it seems that if recording starts, we will begin acting in a way that makes us look good for her vlog.

She will say, “OK, look happy!” and record me laughing with another. It feels forced. It's crucial her to understand that our 10-year friendship still has boundaries. I enjoy being with her, but I also want to experience it without being recorded, edited, or shared for an audience. I’m not a prop for her Instagram.

The Other Side: The Content Creator's View

I want Beth to see that the creations we produce together can get us an opportunity.

I love shooting content. It's more than a pastime; it's integral to who I am. Creating videos and documenting experiences online allows me to show my personality and engage with people in novel forms.

I wouldn't label myself as a professional creator yet, but it’s smart to generate income from your passions. I admire people on social platforms who execute that aesthetic of casual, DIY film-making.

Creating content is my interpretation of engaging with life: observing the nuances, posting them with an audience that values the art behind it. I never intend to make Beth uneasy. Bringing her to industry events was my method of offering access, providing her a opportunity to experience exclusive moments that could benefit her career in design too. That’s not leverage, it's simply being pragmatic.

I would take her to these events even if she didn’t help me, but I want her to see what the content we make together can achieve: a foot in the door. I know not everyone enjoys being on camera, but often spontaneity is what makes material authentic. Being recorded from time to time is an inherent aspect of being my friend. I would delete anything she requested, but she has never asked yet.

I don’t expect anyone to be my private filmmaker, but friends help each other in small ways. I thought filming a short video here or there would be enjoyable for her. Creativity flourishes in partnership, and having Beth around makes projects lively and enjoyable. I don't compel her to take part in anything, and I’d never intentionally humiliate her. But creating content jointly sometimes is part of how I record our time together.

I value our friendship deeply and don’t want making videos to come between us. I’m willing to find middle ground: like asking before recording, and avoiding shots that might make her self-conscious.

This isn’t about control, it's regarding sharing my world while still respecting hers. Obviously making content is not a substitute for genuine friendship: it’s just part of how I experience life and I want her to be involved in a way that’s enjoyable for each of us.

The Jury: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop filming herself and Beth when they are socializing?

Nothing is more excruciating than having a friend point a camera at you. I get that it's her passion, but I don’t make friends come to my work. Maybe she can find like-minded creators to collaborate with. With the dark, looming future of technology, personal relationships are the only thing we have – cherish them!
Liberty, 25

When pursuing something professionally, you can’t ask your friends for help every time, even if they have helped previously. If Marielle loves shooting, that doesn't imply all those around her is content. She must to honor her friend's privacy.
Ankit, 26

She may enjoy producing videos and displaying her life publicly, but it isn't for everyone. It was kind she has assisted Beth’s career, but she needs to hear what her friend desires.
Emma, 27

It seems like you value each other, so hold on to that and ensure it’s the priority in your relationship. Foster some real memories, where true emotions are preserved, not digital scrapbooks. In fact, public figures who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more privacy than it appears.
Sarah, 53

She seems to be not fully engaged nor genuine when they're together – she’s working. Both seem confused as to where the line is. The answer is not found in trying to alter one another, but in each setting defined boundaries around what is comfortable to them and seeing if there is an mutually agreeable middle ground.
A final view, 71

Now You Be the Judge

Consider this question: is Marielle exploiting their bond?